You could not write the shit that has happened to me this week. Even before I had Crazy Oasis Active Man lose the plot at me, the week was already a terrifying experience, dating wise.
I’m an awesome sister, right? My only plans for last Saturday night were to help my brother get ready to go to a fancy dress party. Specifically, to do his make up, because straight boys don’t like shopping for or applying make up, even in the name of fancy dress. So as not to make my night a total waste, I planned to have dinner with my old manager, “S”, on my way home.
While I was driving to her place I noticed a young-ish guy driving a nice car who followed me all the way to her units. I was silly enough to make a comment…
K: “Nice looking guy in a nice car followed me all the way here, he must live in your building.”
S: “Really? Which car? The red car? Oh yeah, I’ve noticed that car, maybe I should leave a note on his windscreen!”
K: *laughter* (second mistake) “I didn’t even see his face properly, what are you going to write? ‘Hi, please post a photo of yourself and some basic information on the nearest telegraph pole so that i can check your suitability for dates’?!” *more laughter* (Are you getting that I’m making a massive mistake by laughing?)
S: *laughter* “Because you know that’s how my daughter met her husband…” (True story, they kept running into each other at the local shops and she eventually left her name and number on his car. The rest, as they say, is history. But I digress…)
K: “HA! Yes, I know, she’s crazy, I would never have the balls to do that!”
S: “I would!”
K: “Yes, because you’re mental! Imagine if someone saw you doing it, how embarrassing… *more laughter* (more mistakes)
Jump forward to the next day. Sunday. Sal and I are in the car on the way to catch up with a few of our mates. My phone goes off. This message says:
“soo i walk out to my car to find a note on it…. that’s not creepy at all…. stalker much? haha”
Oh that’s right, intrepid readers. “S” left my number on this guys windscreen.
Stay tuned, this story is only just getting started.